Final interview transcript

I’m sure you’ve heard of cryptozoologists — you know, the people who search for Yetis and Bigfoots and lake monsters and things like that. In contrast, cryptobotanists search for plants that some people might not believe exist.

For example, the five-leaf clover in northeast West Virginia, which of course people consider extra-lucky. Or the so-called corpse flower of Sumatra, which in addition to being the world’s largest flower, smells very unpleasant.

I was very excited when I got the call to come and look at what promised to be a very unusual plant. The story of a walking plant, a plant that uproots itself and replants itself elsewhere…If I could prove that it really exists, well, it would certainly earn us cryptobotanists a bit more respect.

Unfortunately, when I examined the plant, along with the original planting site by the edge of the playground, I found that the most probable scenario was a simple transplanting event.

The plant itself turned out to be a common oxalis. So even if it were able to uproot itself, it wouldn’t be structurally capable of locomotion because of its weak stalk supports and somewhat clumsy, heavy tuberous roots.